sorry about the lag in posting. i think i am developing a fear of the internet. everything internet related is falling behind. do you think the world would be better if all the computers and tvs stopped working? maybe not at first, but we would get used to it.
i have also come to realize that i have a fear of buying clothes. the last time i bought anything by myself (besides white Tshirts at walmart) was when i bought a couple of jackets a year and a half ago. one of which i never wore. i always feel so guilty when i buy clothes and dont wear them. that's why i dont buy them in the first place.
the other night i had a semi epiphany. i've had two seemingly independent thoughts rolling around in my head for a while that i mull over when im staring at people sleeping in the subway. they both have to do with the character and person of Jesus.
thought the first: the trinity is an autonomous being. however alot of what i hear and think about Jesus makes him sound like he is dependent on human being for his existence. eg if he is merely savior, then he couldn't exist without human being being there. who was he saving before humans and creation existed?
thought the second: what is the bible about? is it about me? i dont really know how to read it sometimes. ive been hearing and reading some interesting things about how the bible is not about me really at all. this is something i had not really deeply pondered until about a year or two ago. what is the bible a testament to? is it about how Jesus came to earth to die for ME? or is it part of the story of how he is going restore his creation and destroy suffering and evil and that we get to be a part of it? i'm still figuring this out, but the latter way seems to fit the bible better. the former way seems to be infected with our contemporary 'me-centered' world view. ive been reading Isaiah lately and when i read it i realize that no matter how much i try i cant get myself into the story very easily like i can in the New Testament where i can pretend im a galatian or peter. Isaiah is God talking to Isaiah and Israel about Israel's sin, God's disciplining of them, and how God will redeem them since they can't do it themselves nor seem to have any interest in it. Now i can act like i'm Israel and its about me, but wouldn't that be kind of weird? this is God talking to a whole nation of people as well as its priests and prophets. moreover large swaths of prophecy is restricted to specific surrounding nations.
What if the book of Isaiah is rather like a personal letter from God to the people he loves and who are breaking his heart because they are hurting themselves and his creation? Thus when we read it we primarily get to know who HE is and knowing ourselves is a corrolary.
ive recently watched Pasolini's 'the gospel according to st. matthew' and what struck this time that didn't before was how Jesus is not smiling at peoples' faces and hugging everyone and making them feel better, but it is more like he's on a mission and picks people to join and follow him on it, telling them that they have no idea what is going to come and they could die and be totally rejected by everyone.
Anyways my epiphany (that im still thinking about ) was that Jesus doesn't need us. Is Jesus essentially savior? he can't be, right? i dont know. the trinity gets along just fine without us. but we cant be the center of reality. I think i need to rethink how i think about Jesus. for example the picture of him in revelation is with a knife for a tongue and bronze legs and white hair (could be wrong about the details... dont have my bible here). the point being he is powerful and mighty and dangerous now. so the sappy Jesus in so many pop christian paintings and movies are missing something i think. instead of reading the bible to find out 'what is God going to tell me today?' what if i read it to know who he is and let that shape me. any thoughts?
that was alot more jumbled than i thought it was going to be.
(digressions- Jesus is the image of the invisible God, right? well then is that Jesus that wrestles with jacob, passes by moses, and fills the tabernacle? anybody have any idea? ive never heard anyone say this so im probably wrong)
it snowed alot last week. we've had a winter camp at my school so ive been working three hours a day. yet i still feel just as tired, which isn't that much, but its just kind of weird.
3 comments:
will, that is a really good post--got me thinking about the nature of Jesus as well.
i am going to write a response immediately, but i think this should become an ongoing discussion though.
yes! we really do believe (wrongly) that the entire bible (no matter who it's talking to) is about us. i think there is a small amount of truth to that thought, b/c God does show His love for His people in the Bible. but that is definitely not the raison d'etre of the Bible. it's God's story. this is incredibly humbling b/c the point of the world isn't just humans as we think it is. the realization is also amazing b/c God intend for us to be part of His story.
and you're right, it does change our perspective of reading the bible, or even going to church/serving others. we are not required to read in order to see what tasty nuggets we glean about being better christians or leading better lives. we get to learn about who God is. truly understanding ourselves can only come as response to God.
anyway, i don't mean to simply reiterate what you wrote in that post. but reading it got me excited. thanks.
John MacAthur has panel discussion 'election and predestination' that obliquely adresses the 'Center' consideration
A caveat that helps me is to consider Phil 2:12 and remember that either/or realites may not be appropriate sometimes and that simultaneous things could be happening.
For God to be the center and us to be the center, my idea of reality would have to be expanded ,which I'm sure is ussually the case,as I am finite ,God is infinite.
The rest I find is knowing that our Father desires and commands/invites us to seek Him and find Him.
One of the greatest challnges for me , is to let reality be defined by scripture particularly when that reality is beyond my experience and more importantly beyond my imagination.
This can be very dangerous waters ,so to speak, and prayerful ,carefull attention I have to give to accurate understanding of sripture ,Biblical doctrine,and concentrated prayer to our Father and Holy Spirit to lead into all truth with the assurance that the understanding given will be according to His will for me at this time and circumstance for me to be about His bussiness.
"i just let them have their way with me." . . . meow!
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